Balance Over Burnout
(This video is recorded from a Facebook Live Session)
“We don’t have to be perfect. We just have to evolve. We have to keep moving forward.” - Katie DePaola, CEO and creator of Inner Glow Circle coach training company
My boss, mentor, role model and partner in crime, Katie DePaola, has graciously gifted us her time and knowledge today with a workshop called Balance Over Burnout.
Not only is Katie a libra and really passionate about educating the modern woman about balance but she is also learning how to create balance in her own life while making a huge impact on this world.
Check out Katie’s words below:
“Hi, I’m Katie DePaola. I’m a founder, I’m a CEO and most of all I’m a survivor.
People ask me all the time, “Katie, how do you balance everything? How are you a CEO of a growing company, who works with private clients, fits in self-care, exercise, medical treatments, and has a relationship?”
What they’re really asking me is “how do you do all the things and do them well? How can I make my life run perfectly like your life?”
As long as we seek the illusive work life balance, we’ll never actually find it. My goal for this talk is that you leave knowing why the key to balance...actually isn’t balance at all.
Balance has become the code word for “perfection.” Most women I know are confident, successful, caring, who do work that somehow helps others and they’re ALL recovering perfectionists.
The idea is that if we could achieve this level of balance, things would finally feel perfect. And if things were finally perfect, then no one would be tired, no one would be craving french fries, and no one would burn out.
We try to better ourselves so we read articles or interviews with women, entrepreneurial women, mom bloggers, celebrities, all of these amazing women, asking about how they manage to “balance it all,” we’re hungry to learn how they do all the things and do them well. But really, the question we’re asking ourselves is, “How can we be perfect, too?!”
This is a fast track to burnout. I believe it’s this striving for balance that actually creates burnout.
Here’s how it happened to me...
I started my company in 2015.
100 days later my brother died from an accidental overdose.
6 months after that, I finally escaped from an emotionally abusive relationship with my then fiancé, who was also my business partner. I had chronic Lyme for a decade in the midst of all of it.
So here I was, this leader of women’s company, this CEO, and all the walls were falling down. For me it was disease, patterns of unhealthy relationships, and stress that burnt me out. I wanted things to be perfect, and they just weren’t.
On very real physiological level, burnout fries our nervous system. When we’re stressed we become more susceptible to getting sick, more sensitive to negative energy and we more easily burnout. We can snap easily, be moody or overly sensitive.
Our nervous system releases a flood of stress hormones. We get adrenal fatigue that causes hormone imbalances. We can feel worried, paralyzed and full on afraid.
Working when we’re sick...
Working when someone we love just died...
Working when we have a newborn...
Working when we have three kids...
Working more than one job...
Working on vacation...
Working while we’re trying to fix your relationship with our partner...
Working while we’re trying to fix your relationship with ourselves...
We’re juggling everything and then we feel guilty for having to juggle! Like “oh I should be the perfect mom and partner and business woman and have the best body and feel no stress and what is wrong with me!!!!?”
Burnout is not bad. Burnout is normal! What’s problematic is trying to reach perfection when we know it never exists. So how do we deal with the burnout?
As busy, modern women who care a lot, we have to evolve our expectations of ourselves and how we approach our businesses and our lives. So the solution to burnout isn’t balance, it’s giving up our attachment to perfection and evolving the parts of our lives that we can.” - Katie DePaola